"The IQ of room temperature..."

I heard somebody's intelligence described in that way recently, and it made me laugh. It also made me think of myself. Here's the deal: occasionally I get bored late at night. In Pennsylvania this problem was usually solved by pranking Mom and Dad in some way when they're exhausted and trying to go to bed. When I lived in Virginia I once decided to go for a walk late at night. This seemingly innocuous idea ended up with me hiding behind a tree in somebody's yard with the dog going crazy and the homeowner trying to figure out what the commotion outside was all about. Then there was the time I got ditched by my friends on the roof of the old burnt-out hotel we were exploring because the cops showed up. A couple weeks ago I found some of those plastic zip ties. I brought a few home thinking they might come in handy if I ever needed to restrain an intruder until the police arrived. Obviously I had to confirm that they were suited to this purpose (late at night of course). Using my teeth I tightened that sucker down on both wrists, and was able to positively confirm that yes- zip ties make great restraints. Lucky for me my toolbox was right in the coat closet. Unfortunately I found that front end nippers aren't easily manipulated when you're holding them between your knees.

Around midnight last night the boredom again struck, and I decided to go outside and review technical rope skills in the tree outside my apartment. There's a big Oak tree in the few feet between the building and the parking lot, and it's a little ways off the sidewalk so I hoped to remain unnoticed. I mean, it was the middle of the night- who in their right mind would be up and about at that hour? Well for some odd reason the boredom apparently wasn't limited to Apartment 78A- several of my neighbors decided it was time to go out. The first guy out got into his car right on the other side of the fence from where I was crouched. He couldn't see me, but the rope dangling down near the side of the building was clearly visible above the fence. The car started- I tensed and waited, causing the rope I was already tethered into to wiggle some more. The car door opened again and he got out. Game's up, I thought- but no- he got back in and drove off. A few minutes later I was 25 feet off the ground and feeling smug about my extreme stealthiness when the flashing lights of a squad car cruised down the road and slowed in front of my building. The officer pulled onto my street and stopped, and I just knew that sneaky low-down neighbor of mine had called in a report of a burglary in progress at my apartment complex. Amazingly though, I realized that the cop wasn't there for me. He was actually pulling somebody over.

At this point I'd had enough of the drama. It was time to switch over from my ascenders to a rappel and get back inside before my rap device earned me an actual rap sheet. Technically I wasn't doing anything wrong, but I highly doubt whether anyone would have believed me. I know I wouldn't have. I'd have nodded and smiled, then dialed 911 asap. "Hello 911? I'd like to report a white male, late 20's, near the roof of the apartment building...." I was just starting to rappel when another guy came out. No problem, I was well up in the tree and I'd just wait for him to leave and then continue. The only hitch in my plan was that he wouldn't leave. He got something out of his trunk, threw some trash in the dumpster, had a smoke leaning against the side of his car, talked on his cell phone, went back to the dumpster. You get the idea. The minutes dragged on as I hung limply from my harness, maintaining tension on the Munter Hitch I was using to rappel. I finally decided I didn't want to be there all night and determined to shoot for a fast rappel while his back was turned. I made it down a few feet, just below the cover of the leaf canopy, when his girlfriend decided to come out and join the fun. I mean, what better place and time to have an argument with your significant other than in the parking lot of your apartment complex at midnight, right? So much for my get-away plan. His back was to me, but she was facing directly towards me. Not only that, but she too had a cigarette, and was doing that thing smokers do, where they take a long drag on the cigarette and then tilt their head back to blow the smoke up in the air. She was looking RIGHT AT ME. I hung there silent and motionless, wishing I had the power to disappear. An 11 millimeter static line isn't much to hide behind. I was fully prepared for the inevitable at any second- a scream followed by- "oh my gosh there's a BODY HANGING FROM THAT TREE!" I had no particular desire to be tied up (har har) in a homicide investigation any more than a burglary.

I couldn't go back up- too much movement and noise to rig the ascenders. I couldn't go down- if they didn't' believe my story I'd be spending the night downtown answering questions. Even if they did believe me, it would still be my most embarrassing moment ever ("how long have you been up there listening to us?" etc. You get the idea).

There's a malady among climbers and cavers called Harness Hang Syndrome (HHS). The basic idea is that as long as you're moving around in a harness, you're fine, but if you hang motionless you will go into hypovolemic shock, lose consciousness and die, sometimes within mere minutes. It's actually true: http://www.texasroperescue.com/library/Harness%20Hang%20Syndrome.htm. Now I don't want to alarm anybody, but this entire post is a dramatization of a silly predicament, so why not go all the way with it. I'm not exactly saying I was at death's door, but I will say that I was not comfortable. The minutes felt like hours. My legs and back were tense and aching, and my arm was tired from holding tension on the rappel. Every time I loosened my grip even a little I'd slide down the rope another inch or two, causing the branch to which the rope was anchored to shake.

For some inexplicable reason I escaped detection. The argument ended with the dude storming off and his girlfriend following. Needless to say I wasn't waiting around to see if they'd come back or who else would show up. I staged an immediate extraction from the roof of the laundry room- I retrieved my gear and made a beeline for my apartment, slamming the door with a euphoric feeling that I had gotten very very lucky. Maybe I wasn't actually as exposed as I felt. Fortunately I had hauled up the tail end of the rope below me- I'm sure that would have been a dead giveaway. And I gotta say it was pretty cool acting all special ops commando with my black gloves and technical gear. It felt like those old war movies where the good guys swoop in from above on the ignorant and unsuspecting guards enjoying a cigarette down below.

Did I learn a valuable lesson from this? You bet- I'm going to bed at 9:30 tonight.

Half Dome

Despite the impression you may get from this blog, CA actually isn't all rugged mountains and scenic coastline. In fact, I should probably post pics of some dilapidated gas stations next to abandoned warehouses, or ugly billboards towering above brown, charred fields, just to balance things out. Nevertheless, I got the chance to visit Yosemite again on Saturday (with five other Oak Brook attorneys from different parts of the Valley), and was blown away by the beauty once again.

Good view of Half Dome from the trail

There are cables anchored to the rock for the final 300 yards.

Someone was feeding a Marmot (something you shouldn't do).

The Cliffs of Insanity. Incontheivable!!

I arrived on top just as this client was finishing a guided climb of the Northwest face that took around 3 days. I offered to e-mail him some pictures, which I'm sure he'll be glad to have.

I'm standing here on what's called the Springboard, or the Devil's Pulpit. (I've heard both.)

Here's part of our group on the descent. 17 miles round trip with 4,000' of elevation gain was enough to wear everybody out!

Mist at the base of Nevada Falls

View from the top of Vernal Falls. (M & D, you may recognize the spot where we turned back when you visited. See the big dead tree? =)

The Mist Trail descending from Vernal Falls.

O Lord my God,
When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed.Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!

When through the woods, and forest glades I wander,
And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees.
When I look down, from lofty mountain grandeur
And see the brook, and feel the gentle breeze.Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!

And when I think, that God, His Son not sparing;
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in;
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing,
He bled and died to take away my sin.Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!

words & music by Carl G. Boberg and R.J. Hughes

Catalina Island

Last Sunday I was invited to join a group of law school friends on a trip to Santa Catalina, an island just over 20 miles off the coast of Los Angeles County. I just learned today that a big chunk of the island is actually on fire right now, so I guess we went just in time! Some of the group brought scuba gear, including me, and it was awesome to go diving after almost ten years!

The ferry ride out

The harbor at Avalon, which besides a village of about two hundred comprises the only city on the island. Avalon's population is around 3,000.

Mark on the walkway to the "Casino," which is actually a movie theater now. My friends Seth and Jeremy tell me they watched the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie here, with the real sounds of the ocean wafting in through the open balcony above. How awesome would that be?!

Jeremy and I in between dives. Our fist dive the visibility wasn't so great, and the surge actually made me sick, but it was still awesome. Dramamine next time...

You can rent kayaks at this small beach on the other side of the Casino.

Sunset as seen from the Ferry on the way back.

Lights of Long Beach as the ferry motored in.

Dome Rock

I had the opportunity to go rock climbing with some SMR teammates on Saturday. The weather was chilly early, but beautiful. We climbed on Dome Rock, a popular crag in the national forest maybe 60 miles from home. It was my first chance to try trad (traditional) climbing a multi-pitch route (for routes that are longer than your rope, you must rig new anchors along the route, and each approximate rope-length section of the climb is called a pitch. After warming up with some short toproped climbing, three of us did a four pitched route called the Tree Route, which is over 300' long. It was also my first shot at slab climbing, where the climb is not vertical. The Sierra has a lot of granite domes, and the techniques for climbing them are different than with face climbing.

Found on the approach trail, this giant pine cone puts my size 11 or 11.5 (can't remember what they are =) shoe in perspective.

Mehmet belays Bo as he sets up a toprope for warming up.

John is lowered on belay after a top-roped climb.

View from the Tree Route, second pitch.

Christie setting up protection for an additional route.

Spring-loaded camming devices (SLCD's) in this crack form the belay anchor for the 2nd and 3rd pitches. The crack is also what makes this route a relatively easy climb.

Christie approaching Bo and the 3rd belay station.

Ready for the fourth and final pitch.

The climb was rated only 5.7, which is fairly easy, but it was perfect for me. Anyway, nothing's easy when you're a few hundred feet off the ground and the wind is blowing your snot sideways. I learned a lot and had a ton of fun. And going with the SMR folks is awesome- their knowledge of the locale, experience and focus on safety is both invaluable and free!

Oh, and in related news, on our way home, there was an official callout for a search and rescue, close to the area we had just left! An 81 yr old man with dementia was reported missing. The sherriff's office basically needed "ground-pounders," since it wasn't a technical rescue, and the county has teams for ground searches. A few SMR people responded nonetheless. As of today, the search is still ongoing. The subject's car has been located high on a jeep trail in the mountains, after having been driven with a flat tire more than twenty miles. Tracks and scent have been found heading south and downhill. The temperature up there has been dropping below freezing at night, so we all hope this gentleman is found soon. I didn't respond because I had a prior committment and I'm not yet qualified by the county (they're still in the process of conducting a background check).

flashback

One year ago today, on the AT somewhere in Tennessee...

Alta Peak

One of the more accessible (reachable within a day) big peaks in Sequoia National Park is Alta Peak. I've been meaning to climb it for a while now, and I finally managed to get up early enough on a Saturday to attempt it this past weekend. I was on the road before five, so there was no traffic, and I put my manual tranny through the ringer on the insanely twisted road up into the park.

It got into the 90's in the Valley that day, but was only around 70 where I was. I guess that's the difference between 300' above see level and 11,200'. At a little over 7k', the trailhead was devoid of snow except for a patch here and there, but by about 9k' I was glad to have my snowshoes.

Routefinding was tricky. The snow obscured the trail entirely in a lot of places, and there were no blazes or other tracks to rely upon. More than once I lost the trail and had to spend time backtracking in order to determine the route. At one creek-crossing, the trail seemed to disappear entirely. After about 20 minutes of scouting, I was seriously considering calling it a day. I didn't want to bushwhack because it would be really inefficient, even if I was able to figure out where to go and not run into an impassable cliff or something, and also, since I was by myself, it was important that I stick to the route, destination, and estimated return time that I had left with a friend. Anyway, I decided to give it one more shot- I walked a little ways downstream from the last known trail spot, crossed, and then worked my way back upstream looking for the telltale "shelf" in the gently sloping terrain that might indicate the trail under the snow. Thankfully, this tactic worked and I was soon back on my merry way.

The final ascent was the toughest. What looked from the bottom like a moderate slope ended up taking me probably two hours to plod up. I wasn't sure how stable the snow pack was at that particular place either, so I stayed close to the rocks and avoided the steep open area in the middle, where there was evidence of at least one recent avalanche.

I saw two marmots (though I didn't know exactly what they were until I got home and looked them up). Pretty cute: big squirrel-like tails and bodies like groundhogs, with grey-brown fur except for the face, which looked black. I hear they can wreak havoc on unattended gear.

Here are some pictures:

Ran into these tracks maybe a mile from the trailhead. Most of you know I have big hands- this bear's print was massive! Certainly bigger than any others I've seen.

He walked up the trail a bit but then (thankfully) diverged off-trail.

View to the South from Panther Gap

The South flank of Panther Peak

Glimpse of the Great Western Divide above the trail to Mehrton Meadow.

Avalanche runoff in the gully below Tharp's Rock.

There's something especially fulfilling about crossing an untracked snowfield at 11,000 feet.

The final approach was bare rock to I scampered up it without my poles and snowshoes.

Watch your step! My little camera doesn't really give a good sense of the vastness and steepness of the terrain. Several spots had me freaking out just a little bit, and I went up the last 10 feet or so on all fours =)

I ran into a guy on vacation from the UK on the way down, and he offered to take my picture.

View of Pear Lake (frozen and snow-covered) just Northwest of Alta.

View to the East from the summit.

Looking several hundred feet down the North face of Alta.

Tharp's Rock as seen from Alta. It's actually several hundred feet lower in elevation. I really want to scramble up that when I come back this summer!

Another view of the Great Western Divide.

I always enjoy most the things that I have to work for, and this hike was no exception. For me, climbing a mountain is an exhilarating experience. The scenery took my breath away, and all I can do is thank God for creating such beauty and giving me the health and opportunity to enjoy it.